WTOQ?! On their Majesty's Disco Service

A collection of songs to please, thrill and inspire you to unleash your inner Old Queen and dance around in your underwear - because we've got nowhere to go in lockdown...

DISCOVERING ‘MASC 4 MASC’

Original article here: https://www.mtv.com/news/2951107/discovering-masc-4-masc/

IT’S NOT JUST A SEXUAL PREFERENCE; IT’S EXCLUSIONARY AND OPPRESSIVE

JUSTIN CLAY 11/15/2016

It was just three years ago that I was a high school student ready to explore the realm of internet dating. One day, I decided to get my phone out and download an app; I prepared my thumbs for all sorts of left- and right-swiping. But my highly romanticized journey with dating apps took a confusing turn when I repeatedly encountered a phrase I soon realized was treacherous: “Masc 4 Masc.”

“Masc 4 Masc” is a phrase with which many gay men on dating apps are familiar. Men often describe themselves this way to indicate that they’re masculine-acting, and are seeking other masculine-acting individuals. Those who use the term tend to be straight-passing men who refuse to communicate with anyone other than straight-passing men, and therefore dismiss and/or degrade feminine or androgynous people. They sometimes use the term “no fems” as well.

Some try to defend these actions and “preferences” by saying things like “everyone has a type,” “it’s just a description,” and “it’s not what I’m into.”

But I certainly find “Masc 4 Masc” problematic. The phrase excludes feminine and androgynous queer individuals — a type of exclusion that speaks to a long legacy of internalized homophobia and misogyny both in the gay community as well as in broader American society. Ingrained homophobia teaches us to accept and normalize relationships that fit into a heterosexist framework and oppress queerness, while ingrained misogyny simultaneously teaches us to privilege masculinity over femininity. Being queer in this type of society already marginalizes gay men, but the way in which they present their gender and sexuality in their own community can ultimately marginalize them further. In a world that expects men to be stereotypically masculine, being effeminate leaves you particularly vulnerable.

Homophobia and misogyny create a looming cloud over queer men: Many are worried of being “noticeably” gay, overly flamboyant, or even slightly feminine. We are taught to monitor ourselves and not disrupt the serene façade of heterosexuality. Queer men who oblige get to establish a false sense of protection from “fitting in.”

I’ve unfortunately experienced both the consequences and the rewards of this dynamic. During my first year of college, I met one of my best friends, whom I’ll refer to as "Ethan." Ethan and I are both gay, and we bonded through confiding in one another about our lives. I had just recently come out as gay after years of denial, shameful secrets, and emotional breakdowns — not to mention numerous failed attempts to be straight and overly masculine. Ethan was more comfortable with his sexuality and expressed himself in more feminine ways. As we had one kiki after another, I felt increasingly comfortable with my sexuality.

But I also learned that being true to yourself can come with challenges. During one of my school breaks, I invited Ethan to my home and introduced him to someone else I know. We spent some time at my house until Ethan had to leave. After he left, this person and I started casually talking in the kitchen. At first, we just talked about our days and our plans for the week. But as the conversation continued, their thoughts about Ethan slowly came out.

“I’m glad you’re not one of those type of gays,” this person said.

I didn’t feel that I had enough knowledge about how to best respond, so I remained silent instead of defending my friend. I unknowingly reaped the benefits of not challenging gender expectations.

While I believe that nothing is wrong with being and expressing yourself in whatever way you desire — whether masculine, feminine, or androgynous — it’s undeniable that masculine-acting queer men reap unparalleled benefits of the patriarchal dividend, and receive unwarranted advantages for being male and masculine in a society that devalues and antagonizes femininity. This leaves room for misogynistic gay men to flaunt their male privilege while screaming for their exclusionary gay rights.

In terms of queer, virtual dating spaces, using the term “Masc 4 Masc” to describe oneself, or being attracted to masculine men, isn’t the problem. It’s that, as a phenomenon, this phrase doesn’t just symbolize a dating preference, but also the dominant, sexist notion that femininity is less valuable than masculinity, and it reinstates the oppressive structures that diminish feminine and queer people. It references and even bolsters the constant distancing, othering, and exclusion of a community that is supposed to be fighting for equality.

We are all products of the societies that we live in, and so are our ways of thinking — even what we find to be attractive. We are all imperfect in this way. But we must constantly question the systems of power in our lives. Why do we find certain characteristics to be attractive? What ideologies could have contributed to how we view different things?

While misogyny and homophobia are two separate (yet often overlapping) spheres of oppression, they are only pieces of the story when it comes to gender, sexuality, and systems of identity. Race, socioeconomic status, ability, global position, and other sexualities and genders are also parts of this broader story that need to be told and listened to in order to achieve true equality.

Back then, I saw “Masc 4 Masc” as just another label into which I didn’t fit. Now, I can see it for its exclusionary and oppressive nature.

And to all of the “Ethans” out there, I’ve got your (our) back now.

Shnack out of it! Yeast free bread

INGREDIENTS

• 4 cups all purpose flour

• 2 tsp baking powder

• 1/2 tsp table salt

• 310 ml water

• 1 tbsp vegetable oil or melted butter

INSTRUCTIONS

• Preheat oven to 375°F. Lightly flour a pizza stone.

• In a large bowl, combine flour, baking powder, salt. Whisk until evenly combined. Add in water and vegetable oil.

• Stir wet ingredients into dry ingredients using a spoon until wet ingredients are absorbed. Use your hands to knead dough a few times until it comes together and has a uniform consistency.

• Shape the dough into a round disc that is no more than 1 ½ inches thick. Place dough onto floured pizza stone. Using a sharp knife, score the top of the dough, cutting an "X" that is about ¾ inches deep.

• Place bread into oven and bake 35-40 minutes, or until bread is done. Bread will turn slightly brown on the surface but will remain quite pale and still look undone since this is not a traditional bread. To check for doneness, tap the bottom of the loaf and it should sound hollow. Slice bread and serve warm with butter or use bread for sandwiches.

NOTES

• Adapted from Fuss Free Flavors

• Instead of water and oil, you can also make this bread with milk. If using milk, you do not need to add the oil or butter but you will need to add slightly more than 310 ml of liquid.

• Make sure the dough is not more than 1 1/2 inches thick, otherwise it will not bake all the way through. 

  Taken from Kirby’s Cravings

What, that Old Cream?! Cake

What, that Old Cream Cake?!

Bake along with Bernie!

INGREDIENCE

THE SPONGE

200g soft butter , plus extra for greasing
200g self-raising flour
1 tsp baking powder
200g golden caster sugar
4 eggs
2 tbsp milk
1½ tsp vanilla extract

THE FILLING

150ml double cream
50g golden caster sugar
½ tsp vanilla extract
100g strawberry raspberry conserve

GANACHE
150ml Double Cream
100g milk or dark chocolate chips (or broken up chocolate)

THIS IS HOW WE DO IT!

Heat oven to 180C/fan 160C/gas 4. Grease and base-line 2 x 20cm non-stick round sandwich tins with baking parchment, then lightly grease the parchment. Sift the flour and baking powder into a large bowl, then tip in all the other sponge ingredients. Using an electric whisk, beat everything together until smooth. Divide the mix between the cake tins, then bake for 20-25 mins until cooked and golden. When cool enough to handle, remove the cakes from the tins, then leave to cool completely on a rack. I usually leave it 30 mins to cool.

To make the filling, whip the cream with the caster sugar and vanilla until it holds its shape. Build the cake by spreading one sponge with jam and the other with cream. Sandwich the whole thing together.

Now we all need a top and this one’s Genache!

In a small sauce pan, bring double cream simmer over medium heat.

Place your chocolate chips - or broken pieces of chocolate into a small mixing bowl.
Pour hot cream over chocolate and let stand 1 to 2 minutes.
Stir with a rubber spatula until smooth.
Carefully and slowly pour ganache over cake, letting drip down sides.
Transfer cake to the refrigerator and let cool until set, for about 30 mins to 1 hour.

Now you have a What, that Old Cream Cake!

If I can do it you can!

Happy Baking!

Daddy training

OK so here we are going to share some blog posts on queer pertinent topics and issues from contributors of interest and guests - and we’ll publish some stuff ourselves - as we have a collective knowledge of 95 years - we may know what we are talking about - Anyway here’s a blog about training to be a DADDY!!

It’s a term used with more frequency today than ever before. What is a gay “daddy”, what makes someone a “daddy”, and what are the issues of being a “daddy” — physical, mental, and otherwise — in the gay community?

That’s the topic psychotherapist Matthew Dempsey, tackled in his latest video.

Wrote Dempsey in an intro to the clip: “Growing up gay, most of us didn’t have parents who shared that identity and could guide us through that experience as we stepped into adulthood. Enter the gay daddy. Whether for friendship or romance, we can easily find ourselves drawn to older gay men for answers we never got and always needed.”

In  the new video (below), Dempsey is joined by a man he considers a “daddy,” his friend Eric Rutherford, who makes his living as a model with IMG.

“You’re kind of like ‘Daddy Goals’ for me,” said Dempsey, who added that people have started to call him a “daddy” because, he believes, of his gray hair and the fact he’s a therapist..

Rutherford, 51, said that when he was young he considered a daddy someone who was more built, had bigger stature, had presence, gray hair, and was a serious adults. And age had something to do with it as well. Today, Rutherford believes life experience and a level of maturity are bigger factors.

Dempsey said that young people seem to have specific ideas of what a daddy is: “When I think of daddy it’s like kind of looking up to somebody, somebody who has a little bit more life experience.”

Rutherford argued that the 36-year-old Dempsey is a “little young” to be considered a daddy, and said that he sometimes feels stereotyped as an older person: “Gray hair signifies old, unable to do certain things – so in my 40s it started to happen, and then now at 51, every now and then I’ll get a comment like, ‘hey grandpa.'”

Replied Dempsey: “What you’re saying about the ageist society we live in is true – that is a social reality, it is a youth-obsessed culture. And so anything that signifies aging, though there might be some perks or benefits in how people perceive that – overwhelmingly, it’s seen as a bad thing,” said Dempsey, praising Rutherford for “owning his age” and not tried to cover it up with Botox or hair color.

Rutherford came clean and admitted using Botox. “Absolutely. It’s not that I’m against it. I’m a proponent of doing things if you want to feel better about yourself. I think there’s a balance. You can’t hide behind it, because no matter what, you could have all this done, fixed. At the end of the day it’s still you.”

Added Dempsey: “If at the core you’re really wrestling with deeper seated things about not feeling good about who you are, if you just look to the exterior to be the thing that’s gonna fix that, it’s not gonna work.”

Dempsey then confessed to his insecurities about aging: “As I’ve gotten older I still maintain a positive perspective but I can feel some very human fears – is this the decline? I see it in my skin – my complexion doesn’t feel as taut as it used to.”

Old gays, new slang

Love this video. Blah blah so hilarious. Older gays something something. Lorem ipsum dolor sit amet, consectetur adipiscing elit, sed do eiusmod tempor incididunt ut labore et dolore magna aliqua. Ut enim ad minim veniam, quis nostrud exercitation ullamco laboris nisi ut aliquip ex ea commodo consequat. Duis aute irure dolor in reprehenderit in voluptate velit esse cillum dolore eu fugiat nulla pariatur. Excepteur sint occaecat cupidatat non proident, sunt in culpa qui officia deserunt mollit anim id est laborum.

SoHo, NYC

SoHo is home to the world’s greatest collection of cast-iron architecture. But more than that, SoHo is unique among New York’s neighborhoods for its classical French and Italian architectural designs. It simply doesn’t look like anywhere else, not even the neighboring West Village or Lower East Side. 

For one thing, the colors are much more distinct in SoHo. They’re brighter. Perhaps that’s a reflection on the people living here. But for many of the cast-iron buiildings that give SoHo it’s unmistakable character, the reason for their bright coloring is actually pretty obvious: whenever you construct anything from wrought iron, it’s going to look like, well, wrought iron.

So the colors of SoHo as they’re known, or at least as they ought to be known, the colors that are just a street photographers dream come true (where else can you find so many amazing backdrops?), are actually the result of many, many coats of bright paints. And they light up a photo in ways even a flash cannot.

Street Scenes

You never know what you’ll find on the streets. And if you happen to be a photographer working in New York, that’s doubly true. I’ve had the good fortune to shoot all over the world, and when I come back to New York, I’m always reminded of why I started my career here.

The New York street scene is, for better or for worse, the street scene. It’s the one that is the most iconoclastic, and because of the backdrop of New York, it’s the one that I think people from just about anywhere imagine when they think of the idea of a street scene—whatever a “street scene” happens to be.

I created this album to showcase some of my favorite street scenes that I’ve captured in New York. This is nothing that I’ve done on contract or in my studio, just real life moments captured by me with my Mark III when I had some time to kick it around the city. I hope you like what you see. I did.